Hello lovely, and welcome back to Confidence & Cappuccino with Nefe.

Now, I have to confess — I’ve been glued to Strictly Come Dancing since Saturday. The new season has just begun, and the glitter is back! And yes, I’ve already picked my favourites. I’m firmly Team Nitro and Karen. Who else? 💃✨

But here’s the thing: as I was chatting with my friend and putting in my (playful!) bets, I realised something. Strictly isn’t just about sequins, spray tans, and samba rolls. It’s about courage, growth, and confidence.

So today, I want to share with you what Strictly can teach us about building confidence in our own lives — and how to step into the spotlight, even if it feels scary.

Part 1: The First Step is Scary (But Necessary)

Imagine walking onto that dance floor in Week 1. The music starts, the cameras are rolling, and millions are watching at home. Most of the celebs are absolute beginners — their knees shaking, their faces flushed, their hearts pounding. And yet… they still take that step.

Think back to Ed Balls doing “Gangnam Style.” He wasn’t a natural dancer by any stretch, but he leaned into the experience, took that first step, and ended up becoming a fan favourite because of his bravery.

In life, we often get stuck in what ifs — what if I mess up? what if people laugh? what if I’m just not ready? (Sound familiar? That’s exactly what we covered in Ep 33 on overthinking.) But just like the contestants, confidence doesn’t come from waiting until you’re perfect. It comes from showing up, nerves and all.

So if you’ve been hesitating on something — applying for a job, signing up for that fitness class, or even just speaking up in a meeting — remember Ed Balls in neon trousers. Just step out.

Part 2: Tiny Wins Build Big Confidence

What I love about Strictly is how you can visibly see growth week by week. Think of Bill Bailey — he started as the quirky comedian, but every week he added another layer: sharper timing, better posture, more confidence. By the end, he won the whole show!

Or Stacey Dooley, who went from “I’m not sure I can do this” to pulling off an incredible show dance that people still talk about.

This is exactly what we explored in Ep 32: Tiny Wins, Big Confidence. You don’t leap from awkward beginner to glitterball champion overnight. You gain confidence one rehearsal, one small step, one “well done from the judges” at a time.

So, what’s your equivalent of learning that one extra step this week? Folding the laundry? Writing one page of your book? Sending that email? Tiny wins compound into big transformations.

Part 3: It’s Not About Luck

Let’s tie this back to Ep 31: Why You Don’t Need the Lottery to Live Your Dream Life.

On Strictly, no one lifts the glitterball because of pure luck. Yes, personality and popularity help, but what really shines through is effort, practice, and resilience. Contestants like Rose Ayling-Ellis or Hamza Yassin didn’t get to the top because of chance — they put in the hours, they listened to feedback, they gave it their all every single week.

Your own dream life works the same way. It’s not about waiting for your “big break” or hoping luck will find you. It’s about building consistency, putting in the practice, and being willing to dance through the awkward, messy middle.

Part 4: You Don’t Dance Alone

One of the most beautiful parts of Strictly is the partnership. Every celeb has a pro dancer by their side — guiding, supporting, encouraging. Sometimes even literally catching them when they wobble.

Think about Kelvin Fletcher and Oti Mabuse — he came in as a last-minute replacement, terrified, but with Oti’s support, he grew week after week and went on to win. Or Rose and Giovanni — their partnership showed us that with encouragement and understanding, people can do things they never thought possible.

Confidence isn’t built in isolation. You need your “Karen” — someone who cheers you on, holds your hand, and pushes you forward when you’d rather shrink back.

So, who’s your partner right now? A friend who texts encouragement? A mentor who guides you? Or even this podcast community reminding you: you don’t have to do it alone.

Part 5: Celebrate Progress, Not Perfection

Finally, one of the most valuable Strictly lessons: the audience doesn’t just cheer for perfection. They cheer for courage, joy, and progress.

Remember Ann Widdecombe being swung across the stage? Or Chris Ramsey, who joked his way through routines but still won hearts because he was clearly trying, learning, and having fun? They weren’t the strongest technically, but people loved watching them grow.

That’s a reminder for us, too: don’t wait for the “10s” or the gold stars. Don’t measure yourself only by flawless results. Celebrate your progress — your courage to show up, your willingness to learn, your joy in the journey.

Summing up

So, whether you’re watching Strictly with me this season or not, here’s what we can take away:

✨ Confidence isn’t built in your head. It’s built in action.
 ✨ Tiny wins stack up into big transformations.
 ✨ You don’t need luck — you need practice and resilience.
 ✨ Support makes all the difference.
 ✨ And progress matters far more than perfection.

This week, I want you to take one small step you’ve been avoiding. Imagine it’s your Week 1 dance. Nerves and all. And then… step out.

Because just like on Strictly, confidence comes when you stop overthinking and start moving.

With love,
 Nefe ✨☕

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